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forgetful's blog: "Random Thoughts"

created on 01/26/2011  |  http://fubar.com/random-thoughts/b339103

Dom/Sub vs. Master/Slave

I wanted to get some comments or opinions on the subject of "sub/dom" vs "master/slave"  The way I see it, being submissive means just that. It doesn't mean subservient to anyone. So the realm of "master/slave" is really far removed from that of a dominant and submissive relationship. 

The following is my personal understanding, PLEASE don't take it as anything other than me putting my thoughts down in order to have a greater understanding. I'm perfectly willing to accept constructive criticism and alternate explanations.

Dom vs. Master: To be dominant over someone means that you have a responsibility to the one or ones you "dom" over. You are a leader and a strong personality. You have accepted the role as teacher and guide and you are willing to do your best to show your sub more about themselves. To help them to look inside themselves and find that place where they are truly happy and able to release any inhibitions. As a dom you may use means that seem to others to be cruel or painful, such as tying your sub up or using tools to inflict a certain amount of pain until your sub is forced to remove those final mental blocks and revel in the release. Using punishment to show them the way and showering them with affection and attention when they reach new milestones.  Masters on the other hand seem to me to be somewhat self serving. The pleasure they get from being a master is at the expense of their slave. They may give pleasure to their slave, but in the end it is the master that recieves the most benefit. The master will expect the slave to do their bidding and bend them to their will, breaking them if necessary. From what I've seen, once a slave is truly broken the master has little further use for his slave except as a plaything for their amusement. A master can be an artist of manipulation and pain, like a dom, but the master manipulates for their own ends and not the benefit of their slave.

Sub vs. Slave: A sub means submissive to the will of their dom. they want to know more about themselves and are willing to give themselves over to a dom in order to reach this greater understanding. They place a great faith in their dom, otherwise they will never reach the understanding they are looking for. Even when a submissive gives him or herself over to their dom, they are expected to resist to a certain extent. It's natural to resist and in some cases even fear the things we don't understand. It seems to me that the sub must choose to give themselves over to the dom in order to reach this final understanding, if not then there will never be the necessary bond of trust there. Slaves never really get to develop the bond that a sub has with their dom. Slaves can't becasue their existence is to please (in one way or another) their master. They learn what their master wants and are expected to do what their master says. They, like the sub, are expected to resist their training. If they don't resist, they may already be broken and of no further use or amusement. The excitement of the slave is in their resistance and their breaking.

 

I know this is kind of long, but if anyone can give me a better insite into the subject I would be happy to hear it. I don't mean three or four words of criticism and nothing to back it up, I mean words of teaching and understanding. I know there is a plethora (sp?) of information out there about dom/master, sub/slave but a lot of it is either false or mixed together.  I don't believe they are one and the same at all.

 


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