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son of sid's blog: "The cook book"

created on 10/13/2006  |  http://fubar.com/the-cook-book/b13418

Chest notes

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I feel like blogging today So I am going to tell all of you about a friend of mine named Dave Hartley. I have known good ol Dave for 14 years now. One of the most annoying features about Dave other then his incredible luck is the fact that he just refuses to die. I mean with the risks he takes he should have been dead a long, long time ago. So of course I felt pretty safe betting that he would be dead in the next 5 years. Well I was wrong and now Dave has been costing me $20 a year since 1995. Oh well.

So anyway years ago Dave used to make it a habit to pass out at my house on pretty regular bases. Now, if you have been reading my other blogs you will realize that passing out in front of me is kind of like dangling a piece of meat in front of a lion. I can not help myself. So there I was watching Star Trek minding my own business and there Dave was passed out on the floor during a commercial I looked over at Dave's passed out form on the floor. He looked so peacefull. Looking at my friend I realized that it would be a total shame to disturb him. While I was trying to resist the urge to do some evil to my friend I did notice a Permanent blue sharpie pen lying on the floor next to him. Luckily the commercial ended and Star trek came back on so I was suitably distracted from doing something mean and evil to Dave. This is a good thing because I really did not want to do something mean to Dave.

Eventually another commercial came on. So there was Dave, a blue pen, and boredom . I tried not to do it, but eventually I discovered the blue pen in my hands while I was busy coloring Dave's hand. I spent the rest of the night coloring Dave during the commercials. I started with his hand then I colored his face and neck, but eventually there was nothing good on T.V. so I went to bed.What I did not realize was that Dave had a job interview at Denny's the next morning and because he was out drinking the night before he woke up late and hung over. So he rushes out the door with his blue face and hands. Poor Dave…. The good news is that he did get the job. (GRIN)

Now you might think this is the end of my story, but well it is not. You see a few months later I get a call from the police. They wanted to know if I have seen Dave because apparently Dave got himself all liquored up and decided to walk down off the Mountain. I personally believe that a naked man on Casper mountain might have had something to do with it, but I do not know for sure.

So because I see that I need to do my Christian duty by trying to find my friend to make sure he is ok. I start calling around. Eventually I trace him down to a party at the K.C. apartments. So I go bebopping over there to try and find Dave. When I get there, I walk up to the door where I can see a VERY large passed out topless dude in a recliner. So I knock. The dude did not move. So I holler at him….. He did not even flinch. So I let myself in and nudge the guy…. He did not even snort. This dude was out. And I still have not found Dave, so I look around for something to write a note to Dave on. And all I can find is a black Sharpie pen and no paper. But that was ok. There was a passed out topless dude. So I start writing on the guys chest this note. "Dave, Call me! P.S. Do not tell this guy who I am!!" About two hours later I get a call. Guess who it was. IT WAS DAVE!!!! He was ALIVE!! YEA!! oh wait. Damn now I owe another $20! Ok, Ok I was happy Dave was alive! and he got my message. Apparently the topless man woke up saw that he had been used as a note pad and was PISSED as hell about it. So he called Dave up and yelled at him for his graphitied condition! Dave promised not to tell him who did it!!

Oh and if you happen to know Dave. Then can you tell him to give me a call. As I kind of do not know who's chest he looks at these days! So I do not know who to write on!(HA HA)
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