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Recently there has been some confusion over certain particular pieces of art in my albums on here. Most are over one in particular. It is a poetic representation that someone (not myself) wrote concerning the "general" BDSM relationship between two consenting adults.
Not all Dom/mes use harsh terms in addressing their subs. Mine does not, because of the ways some of those words were used toward me for a number of years in BAD relationships He doesn't wish to emulate. Every Dom/me has the choice of being a gentle or harsh Dom/me, and most will take their sub's feelings into consideration, especially outside the scenes. Many of these relationships are loving and end (or sometimes begin) in dating and/or marriage. We are used to being persecuted for our beliefs, however sad that may be. Please, before you make blanketing comments on a graphic describing a lifestyle, take a moment to learn about that lifestyle and its participants, choices & rights before saying something that shoves your foot in your mouth. Take note of the wording in this piece - "IF HE SAYS...then i am..." If is a large word, meaning there is choice. Nowhere in this piece does it say that i am or He says that i am. He doesn't call me any of the derogatory things mentioned because i am not any of those things in His mind. Maybe the author's Dom did, however, so she wrote it as such.
Now, I understand that many of you look at "BDSM" as being synonymous with D/s, but that is not entirely the case. BDSM is mainly the scene, the "play-acting" as you will, surrounding the act of sex in a D/s relationship. It can involve anything from role play to bondage, costumes to whips. Whatever the "actors" choose. A loving, cohabiting D/s couple, however, need to transition this in some way into their daily lives. Sometimes it is very male-dominant, sometimes female-dominant, and sometimes it is on a more equal plane.
Even in today's "modern" "feminist" or "women's lib" society, the BDSM lifestyle isn't the only D/s relationship! Many Christian sects teach their men to be the leaders in ALL aspects, especially church and home. Women in these congregations have "rights" but are morally obligated to follow their husband's lead. One of my best friends and her husband are Baptist, and she "submits" to her husband's will in everything from asking his permission before accepting an invitation to come visit or have me visit her, is in charge of the children, the household, meals, etc. They both worked (she now stays home, but will return to teaching once their youngest enters school), yet he would come home and sit down with a beer & the remote while she continued working. That is a form of a D/s relationship based on the Bible's teaching. The verses they take their household hierarchy from include (but are not limited to):
(Courtesy of www.crosswalk.com Bible study tools)
Aaron and I are God-fearing Christians that happen to not only obey these verses in our daily lives (outside the bedroom), but we also carry this role into the bedroom. At times he will open the door for me to assume the more dominant role, and at times I will take that opportunity as I know it is what he wishes. Our aim is to please each other in our relationship as well as in our sexual relations. Neither of us takes our role "too far" or endangers the other ever. We are completely in love, and feel ourselves blessed to have the other in our lives. Every word spoken to each other is with love and consideration. We prefer to use terms of endearment versus some Dom/mes that prefer to keep their submissives at "arm's length" or out of their personal life entirely, separating him/herself in two. Our D/s relationship didn't blossom until after we'd known each other over a year and had been dating over a month. Our love and its relationship takes precedence over our D/s roles, but they walk hand-in-hand more often than not.
I always feel loved, whether it's Aaron my Master, Aaron my best friend, or Aaron my future-husband talking to me, making a request of me, or ordering me to do something. I gladly heed his words, not because I fear his punishment but because I love him and by doing what he asks I am making him happy. My happiness comes from those around me that are happy for/with me. My pleasure comes from knowing I've given others happiness and pleasure. My heart fills with joy at words of praise from my friends', family's, and Master's lips as all humans do.
We all get joy and happiness from accolades and praise. We all want to hear someone is proud of us and/or loves us. It's human nature. Why we can't all try as hard to see others' points of view, or accept others' flaws instead of targeting them is beyond my comprehension. Just because someone does or says something differently doesn't mean you have the right to target them, harass them, or become a true bully by recruiting others with the same mean spirit to harass them, then taking joy and pride in their suffering.
There are MANY adult-aged bullies on this site. Those who love to prey on others for their own satisfaction. Sadly, they are the ones in need of the most love, for apparently they have some great void inside their hearts they assume only ripping others apart will fill. Or worse, they have no soul at all, and are trying to fill their empty space up with Satan's evils instead, gaining his favor points for every tear caused, every heart broken, every spirit crushed with harsh words and unthinking harassment. I like to take the Christian approach and go to them directly, revealing what their words have done. If that doesn't work, I bring it before the proper authorities. If that still yields no reprieve, or the authorities take too long, I bring their grievances in front of the assembly for public appeal.
A lovely friend of mine I haven't had the chance to speak with in over 2 years now once gave me this advice (and she was pagan): "Say of those that hurt you, 'Let them get what they deserve.' For with those words, you are not stooping to their level of malevolance, wishing ill upon them, but merely allowing the powers that be, that govern all of us, to deal with this miscreant child with the poers' choice of punishment (which will, inevitably, be MUCH more effective and constructive than anything we mortals can accomplish for revenge)."
Yet still, words said with malice behind them still sting, still bring tears. Despite what anyone thinks or says on here, my real-life friends know my value, my tender-heartedness, the height of my intelligence, and the ease with which I am brought to tears. You may say to me, "It's just a silly game" or "They're only brave because they're hiding behind a computer to say those things" or "They must be shallow people to be amused by hurting others, don't let it bother you." You may say these things to me, but they will not do any good. I cannot change who and what I am. I am a very easily-wounded soul, a tender, delicate person inside. It was the harassment of people like this that forced me to become a near-recluse over the last 33 years. First, being picked on by school bullies, then being emotionally abused by my husband of 10 years, and now as an adult I'm forced to deal with insensitive, ignorant, hateful bullies still?? I am a nervous wreck, a sick person dying slowly from the inside out because of what people make me feel. I've begun to assume that for every good person on this planet, there are 5 bullies to keep them secluded, because if we ever got together, our energy would be more powerful than the "Care Bear stare."
Bullies, whether child or adult, online or in person, are doing the devil's work. They are breeding anger, hate, discord. They spread lies, deceit, and twist things to suit their agendas. They are skillful in their ability to get people on their "bandwagon" as well as jumping on others' when it looks to provide a good source of amusement for them and their underworld ruler. Whether they have admitted it or not, they are working for him, and not for the side of good as some would proclaim. Some will try to convince you they are the most Christian Christians, martyrs to the cause. However, they are wolves in sheep's clothing, who are pulling you into their web of hate. I beg of all my friends, when you see someone being bullied, stand up for them. When you see someone bullying, stand up TO them. If enough of us reach out and assert ourselves against them, we just may be able to lessen evil's strong grasp on those who would persecute us.
