fucking hate this .. i hate feeling like this, cant shake the mood .. not happy not sad , not mad .. i just am .... i cant stand this just want to do something be somewhere or be with someone ..the one.. i dont want to be here now i want to be there .... anywhere .... i dont know why i am like this i have never been like this .... feel like i lost something , someone . . has anyone ever felt this way ? tell me please .... why is it when ya try to do whats right .. its so hard .. why is it when ya let go it never comes back ... ahhhhh .. lol i laugh caus im weak ... i cry caus im lost ..... i want to be found ..... fucking find me...... i write because i could never talk like this in life ... i smile i nod . i do ...... but what do i do ? nothing that means anything to me ... i want to be great in her eyes i want to do the things that matter in her life .. ahhhh this just fucking sucks ...