My friend Donna and I spend a lot of time bemoaning the idiocy of men in southwestern Pennsylvania. The guys who are all into you one minute (hours and hours of conversation), then don't contact you for weeks to months to... ever. The guys who make dates, then blow you off. The guys who pursue you, then when you acquiesce, are suddenly uninterested.
Donna keeps telling me she has more luck when she plays hard to get, and I should try it, as well. I don't understand that concept, though. I mean, noone likes someone who comes on too strong -- who meets you and is all "Can I be your boyfriend!! You're so beautiful and wonderful and blah blah" right away. That's definitely a turn-off. But when someone whose company I enjoy wants to spend time with me, why should I play hard to get? Why should I pretend I'm too cool to hang out with him right away, but maybe could fit him in, in a few days?
I've always been a proponent of "what you see is what you get." I don't pretend I'm not complicated, but I do think I do my best to be straightforward. I don't say things that I don't mean. I try to treat people as I want to be treated. I don't flirt if I don't really, honestly mean it.
A few months ago, I
blogged about dating myths, and one of the things I mentioned was
The Rules, and the idea proposed within it that women should play games, and that men are interested in women who play games. And, I just don't get it. But obviously it's true to a certain extent, since I run into all of those problems I outlined in the first paragraph.
Still, I guess I'd rather still be me, and be alone, than try to be someone I'm not, in order to attract someone who wouldn't want me as myself. Perhaps that makes me inflexible. C'est la vie.
