How women shower:
>
> Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
> lights and darks.
>
> Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the
> way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more
> sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
>
> Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide
> loofah and pumice stone.
>
> Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins .
>
> Washyour hair again to make sure it's clean.
>
> Condition your hair with grapefruit mint-conditioner.
>
> Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
>
> Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse
> conditioner off hair.
>
> Shave armpits and legs.
>
> Turn off shower.
>
> Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
>
> Spray mold spots with Tilex.
>
> Get out of shower.
>
> Dry with a towel the size of a small country.
>
> Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
>
> Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see
> husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
>
> Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a
> pile.
>
> Walk naked to the bathroom.
>
> If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo- woo sound.
>
> Look at your manly physique in the mirror admiring the size of your wiener
> and scratch your butt.
>
> Get in the shower.
>
> Wash your face.
>
> Wash your armpits.
>
> Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>
> Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>
> Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>
> Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs sticking on the soap.
>
> Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>
> Pee.
>
> Rinse off and get out of shower.
>
> Partially dry off.
>
> Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the
> whole time.
> Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>
> Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>
> Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off
> towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
>
> Throw wet towel on bed.
>
>
>
> If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
> there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day!
>
> Oh, and...woo-woo!
>