Well now that I am almost completely better, its time to find a job. This is the part I hate. Give me any job and I will work 110%. I hate trying to sell myself to get a job. I can talk my way into any job if given a chance to get an interview. My problem is not many will talk to me due to lack of work history.
It has been about 5 months and still its hard to sleep alone. After years of having someone sleeping next to me its been hard to adjust to not have anyone there. Don't get me wrong it is a much needed time to find myself and figure out what went wrong and try to fix it.
I have done a lot of refection on my past ex's and my life. I have finally realized I have gotten over most of the really bad shit in my life. Granted I will never forget, but I refuse to let it affect me like it used to.
I also realize that I am scared of trying to date again. To get involved with someone will be a true test if I have really learned from my mistakes. I do not want to get hurt let alone hurt anyone else. I have learned to try and slow down from how I once was. I will take things slow (hopefully, LOL) and learn about the person I want to be with. Take time to get to know each other and then see how things go along the way.
I know a couple men that have shown interest in having a relationship with me, but I am not sure. There is only one that comes close to mind that I would. But not sure if I am ready yet. I want to but scared. I really need to get on my own two feet first with a job. Then I will see how to proceed.
Why does life have to be so difficult, LOL. Why does our choices have to be so hard. Why can't the choices be clear and precise. Oh well thats just how life is.
I hope all is going well for everyone. May the Goddess watch over, protect and bless you all.
