I'm home again... This time I absolutly do not know for how long. I am 90% sure i'm moving back to Pennsylvania. The 10% left over is not doubt, just lack of finances....I pulled into RR /Gaston area yesterday, only to feel sick...I honestly felt as thou I would puke. I love my sister and her Husband (Jerry), them and Yumi is the only "real" family I have. But other than them, I hate everything about this area... The memories, the smell, ( and anyone that has ever been down here knows what I mean, Paper Mill....LOL)
I went out last night with Yumi and Josh...and several of their friends...I was nervous to even be out, I'm always afraid "he" or his "skank" will walk thru the door. So we hung in the back so I saw everyone... With the ppl I was with, I had a wonderful time. But feel bad, cause I had to be "drunk" to even be out.
This time when I went to Pa. I stayed with my "cousin" and her family. I did enjoy this. I give her credit to work 3 jobs and raise 2 teens alone. With hardly and problems from them. They are great kids...
I saw my "Aunt" Helen... Who is battleing her 6 th cancer. this is her 2nd time for her liver. She is not doing well at all this time. I'm glad I spent time with her. She's always been there for our family for 40 yrs..I wish I could do more for her...
I talked to me and my sisters best friend. That was great. She never changes.
Which brings me to the best time I had up there this past week.....I met the most wonderful man. We've talked here for awhile...And I knew I wanted to meet him, but with all that is going on and has went on in my life, I was scared...Its all still a little new to me. I do not know what to expect on a "date"...which we had last Saturday... It was the sweetest, most fun I have had in years. We talked, ate at Olive Garden (One of my favs. , which he picked out...the only desision I had to make was what I wanted to eat..)
Or evening was cut short when a call from his babysitter stating his daughter was sick. This is understandable , when you date a single father with 3 children. But, my thing was, he was so conserned (as a father should be). But this was so sweet, and for some reason, I saw something in him, I'm not used to seeing in any father...and it made me like him even more. Then he was upset he had to cut our date short...Of course I was upset, but only because I wanted to spend more time with this wonderful person, but to me it's never an issue when it comes to your children, they come first....
I saw him on Fri nite/Sat morning to start with... but this was the start of what I would hope to be a great relationship...
From then we saw each other every nite... I finally met his children, and saw him in action... This made me feel even more connected to him. He is a wonderful person, father and man... I dont't think my life could get any better at this moment...( well, it could if I had money and I was up there with him right now)
i HONESTLY NEVER THOUGHT i COULD LOVE AGAIN...I only wanted a friend , but I hope I've found more than that. We have a long ways to go, we both have "ex marriage" things to do.. we have time... All I know is at this moment, I'm sitting home alone, and I'm missing him...His smile, this thoughtfulness of bringing me a rose...or a Diet Pepsi... It's the small things that helped him warm my heart....I may be "in love" again guys!!!!! hehehehehe.....
