Dear Tawnya,
I loved you. I don’t know how I can state it any more plainly. I loved you for everything I thought you were, and for everything that I became when I was with you.
When we were together, I felt truly happy and complete in a way that I had never felt before. Being with you recontextualized everything that I thought I knew about love, and I came to understand that while I had felt love in the past, it was only a shadow of what real love could be.
Now, I don’t honestly believe that I will ever find someone who I can feel that same love for, and with that realization, I can find very little motivation to experience the future at all.
The two of us related on a level that went beyond simple emotion or base attraction. We made our connection on a truly spiritual level, which is something so rare as to be unique in our lives, and something that I believed was worth trying to hold onto.
I loved you the moment i met you, like all the pieces were falling into place. i always felt like i had been waiting for something, something bigger than myself, and when i met you i just knew instinctively that you were what i had been waiting for. i’d never believed that love existed, i thought it was just chemical, but i couldn’t breathe if you weren’t next to me i couldn’t think, i couldn’t function. i felt like an idiot, you made me feel like an idiot.
And now is it done.
Done for that other man in your life ?
Done why i am in Germany and you in the States ?
Done, In the while i was figure out how i can stay there ?
Now when i was sure to marry you in 2011
You broke my heart