Over 16,533,902 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?
1. Ever been compelled to fill out an asinine survey?
Regularly >>
2. Ever tear the tag off of a mattress depsite risk of fine and/or imprisonment? Mine actually wore off after a while
3. Ever used an aeresol can other than directed (bonus cool points for as a flamethrower to kill a spider)
Yeap. I like spiders though.
4. Ever put in excess of 5 pringles in your mouth at once?
Truth be told, I probably have
5. Ever been driving and kinda flinch because you dont remember part of the ride?
Yeah, long boring stretches of highway in eastern kansas have a hypnotic effect on me. I might be able to drive Highway 75 in my sleep.
6. Ever sneezed in your hand, and then were immediately confronted by someone that wanted to shake?
yes... and I said "Oh, I'm terribly sorry- I just sneezed, could you please forgive me"
7. What diversion did you create to get them to shake the other hand? See above. I didn't shake at all.
8. Ever been so drunk you ate all the individual components of a sandwich, but never actually made a sandwich?
Isn't that how everyone eats fried bacon/egg sandwiches?
9. Not counting medical facilities or online...Whats the largest number of people that have seen you naked at once?
uuuh 2? Maybe three? Wait no... shower pounce/sexual assault- about a dozen
10. What was the situation in question 9?
Gym class wanted to see my dick (carpets match drapes), so they ganged up held me down, and pulled my shorts off. Fun memories...
11. Have you ever recycled a miss work excuse?
And did anyone remember you already used that one?
You've never had flu twice in the same year? You suck.
12. Ever knock one off in traffic?
Can't say as I have.
13. Ever peed on a jellyfish victum? No.
And did they ask you to first? No.
or did ya just let it fly? No.
14. Have you ever verbally said an internet acronym in r/l?
Regularly with my friend Chris.
15. What is the most embarassing concert youve attended that you dont normally mention?
I don't like concerts.
16. Have you ever pitched a beer can out the passenger window into the bed of a pickup and it was sucked back in the back sliding window and nailed the driver in the head?
Nope. Open container law is srsbsness.
17. Have you ever shot a road sign?
Yep! Hit the O dead center, while going down a gravel road at about 50
18. Have you ever had an injury and lied about the cause?
Regularly- check out all these knife fight scars.
19. Ever been asked to leave a late night breakfast joint?
Nope. I'm a good tipper and used to be a regular when I was working nights.
20. Explain in one sentence, no less than 10 words, no more than 15, how you feel about RediWhip
Who the fuck gives a flying fuck about my opinion on rediwhip?
