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Love is grand!
Divorce is a hundred grand.
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I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
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Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.
***************************
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
**************** ***********
Even if you are on the right track,
You'll get run over if you just sit there
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Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.
They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason.
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An optimist thinks this is the best possible world.
A pessimist fears this is true.
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There will always be death and taxes.
However, death doesn't get worse every year.
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In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
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I am a nutritional overachiever.
***************************
I plan on living forever.&n bsp; So far, so good.
***************************
Practice safe eating -- always use condiments.
***************************
A day without sunshine is, like, night.
***************************
It's frustrating when you know all the answers,
But nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
***************************
The real art of conversation is not only to say
the right thing at the right time,
But also to leave unsaid the wrong thing
at the tempting moment.
***************************
Brain cells come and brain cells go,
But fat cells live forever.
***************************
Age doesn't always bring wisdom.
Sometimes it comes alone.
***************************
Life not only begins at forty,
It also begins to show.
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I smile because I am your friend!
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.
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