Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray for a man who’s not a creep
One who’s handsome, smart and strong
One whose willy is thick and long
One who thinks before he speaks
When he promises to call, he doesn’t wait weeks
I pray that he is gainfully employed
And when I spend his cash he’s not annoyed
Pulls out my chair and opens my door
Massages my back and begs to do more
Oh send me a man who’ll make love to my mind
Knows what to say when I ask ‘How big’s my behind?’
One who’ll make love til my body’s a twitchin
In the hall, the loo, the garden and the kitchen
I pray this man will love me no end
And never attempt to shag my best friend
And as I kneel and pray by my bed
I look at the shithead you sent me instead
Amen