What is a sister in Collar? June 29, 2006
Wow, the term encompasses so much. I suppose one would have to know basically what it means to "be in Collar" first. For me, a big part of wearing His Collar is trust. Aside from the pleasure/pain aspect of the sexual side of the relationship, trust is a big part ofwearing the Collar. I wear the Collar 24/7 (well, minus an hour or so when I am taking a bath), it is a constant reminder of the trust I have placed in my Masters hands. I literally trust Him with my life. I have willingly given Him many things that most people take for granted in their own lives. One example is the ability to orgasm. He is the only one allowed to share my word that triggers my orgasms, and I have to trust that he will not abuse the word, nor give it to someone who would. Granted, that might or might not seem tame to people, but there are times where I literally place my life in His hands. Being tied up, asphyxiation, edge play (knives), for example, are all potentially dangerous. The Collar is a symbol of my trust in Him, and also singnals to myself and others that I am bound to Him. It is much the same as a wedding ring, though the symbolism at times, and depending on the relationship runs much deeper, and on a much more primal and intimate level.
Each of my sisters have their own idea of what it means to "be in Collar". Suffice it to say, it is equally as important to them. The fact that we each trust Him with our lives, puts us all at the same level with each other. He also trusts each of us. On a basic level, because we trust Him, and his decisions, we also trust one another. It does however go beyond even that. We all share a deep friendship and love for one another. We are sisters. We do have our quarrels, and our tizzy fits. We are individuals, so we are not going to agree on everything. On the other hand, because of the nature of the relationship we have with our Master, and with each other, what affects one of us, affects all of us. When one is sad, even if that person does not say anything, we ALL feel it, we ALL know about it, and we ALL work on ways to try to help. This is what draws us closer together. When one is happy, we ALL share in that happiness.
We may not be related by blood, but we are sisters by choice and in Collar. We share similar goals and are dedicated to helping each other reach those goals. My sisters are very important to me, as is their happiness and well being. What is important to realize is that we depend on one another for emotional support. It is not always easy being in a polyamorous relationship, sometimes fears come up, and we are there to help each other through the difficult times. Sometimes there are issues in our other relationships, it is at these times we seek support, or advice. Sometimes we need a swift kick in the ass with an honest opinion.
All that being said, we are sisters, lovers, friends, and a support group. We each fulfill a special place in each other's lives. Granted we each have our other friends and loved ones, but there is a special place that is filled by your sister in Collar. They are the ones who understand what subspace is, they understand the downtime that comes a few days after an intense session with our Master, they understand the nuances of what it means to be in a Poly BDSM relationship. I am thankful to have my two amazing and beautiful sisters in my life, and I thank them for accepting me into theirs.
143
