Crippled I've been,
Scarred I will be.
Did you think of that when
you began to use me?
Your claims to care,
that you wished me no pain,
just fed my dispair
for your complete disdain.
You paid no notice to my distress
for my state of undress -
your state of undress.
I was only a CHILD!
still meek, still mild.
With age,
came rage.
You'd not touch me again.
Did you think I'd never change?
Was I to ignore the past?
Surely your mind was deranged
to think THAT would last.
My memories never fade.
They are vivid still.
That you never paid
Makes me feel ill.
Your escape, your death,
I still don't feel free.
Why doesn't your lack of breath
do anything to help me?
My rage seems dull now-
It has lost it's focus.
My pain still festers.
I thought it would fade.
I'd hoped to move past.
But it has stayed,
and seems it will last
for the rest of my life -
Will my emotions always be in strife?
27 January 2004