Trying not to break down and cry. It has been a very hard winter. This foot of mine is hurt and hasn't healed and only seems to be making me sad. I am angry that it wasn't caught earlier. I think I am allowed to be angry about that. A torned ligament is pretty significant compared to sprain. Both take time to heal but ligaments are trickier.
When I am low I don't want to talk or share my feelings. I want to close up shop and hide away until the storm blows through.
The doctor wants me to immobilize back into the boot with crutches and be completely non-weight bearing. this is not something I wish to be after being forced to be weight bearing. I know they didnt know it was the wrong direction to push me in but fuck I hate cruthces!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you don't understand why this is bringing me down, you have most likely never lost the ability to stand or walk on your own two feet. LUCKY you! Be thankful for that!!
So this is all I have to say and I hope no one takes my silence personally.
So here's the thing. We don't have to date long. Just buy me some flowers and spend the night with me and we can say goodbye. But do buy me flowers that will die before my sheets are cold mmmmk.
Bitterness is a nasty pill to swallow. I don't want it. But I am sitting here explaining to my buddy why it is I am not going to be seeing someone I thought I was. Why do I need to explain someone else's actions or choices? FFS...I am so not in the mood for explanations when I know nothing. I know my job, my kids, myself, but as for anyone else I only know what I am allowed to know. I can assume...and I am probably dead on there..but it's not the same as knowing.
And seriously I know it's me. I don't need any advice or consolation. I am not interesting. I am extremely naive and incredibly easy. I am also fat. I am boring. Blah Blah Blah!
I will not stay bitter..it will pass quickly...but I might be a bit shitty or short for a while. I am not feeling spectacularly spunky.
But do feel free to lie to me :) It will get you anywhere you want to go.
OK pity party over..and don't stalk my page if you have nothing to say. I might just do something shitty like delete and block you for it. Who knows...I might not even like you. GRRRR.